"Difficult does not mean impossible."

Reflection

In graduate school, I was able to go on a service learning trip to Merida, Mexico with a few of my classmates and professors.  We were able to help in a variety of settings without worrying about insurance or money.   We were there on Our Lady of Guadalupe day and experienced genuine Yucatan culture.  Everyday we would have group reflection about our experiences of the day.  We also kept a journal with our personal reflections.  I never wanted to forget my thoughts, feelings, and lessons I learned.   That trip was one week. 

Learning, growing, and improving myself has always been something that is important to me.   2012 has been completely different than any year for me.  I have made huge improvements on things that I really needed to work on.  I achieved my goal of completing a half ironman.  I initially kept a hand written journal, but I didn’t keep it up.  This time, I am going to keep myself accountable by creating a blog that my friends, family, and teammates can read. 

This past Sunday, I signed up for a full Ironman. It’s a dream of mine to complete a 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike, and a 26.2 marathon and to hear "Kristen, YOU ARE AN IRONMAN."  To some, this is crazy, but to me it’s a journey that helps me grow as a person.  Do I want to be a faster swimmer, CYCLIST, or runner? You bet, but I mostly do these races for what I learn about myself and about life; the experience is like nothing else.  The instant bond created with people you train with is unexplainable.  The joy that I have when a teammate crosses the line, places 1^st in her age group, or does some thing that they thought they couldn’t do is priceless. 

One of my goals is to be able to able to learn to put my training and experiences into words.  2012 was a great year and 2013 will most likely top it.  I don’t want to ever forget the challenges, the highs or the lows, experiences, and everything I will learn this year. 

I asked a patient today “When was your favorite time in your life?”  I was making conversation, mostly to get him to talk about something he enjoys, but it also got me thinking.  I have been blessed and have enjoyed my first 30 years of life, but I have a feeling that 2013 is going to be one of the best.  I will discover endless possibilities of where my life can go, my dreams, and what I am capable of doing.

Yesterday I accomplished something that I have wanted to do for a long time. I have been unofficially training for a triathlon for over two years, ever since I bought my road bike. I have been swimming consistently since 2008, training for half marathons. I have envisioned crossing the finish line of a half ironman for a long time and I finally did it. I swam 1.2 miles, biked 56 miles, and ran 13.1 miles. I found a coach and a team, trained for 18 weeks, put a lot of work into one single goal -- to cross that finish line. I had tons of support from my coach and the team, my Dad flew in, Jason was there, and a bunch of my friends showed up with funny signs and pictures. I pushed myself hard on the swim and the bike and beat my time goals. It was very hot and it was difficult to push myself -- but I only exceeded my run goal by 6 minutes. I ran a half marathon in 2:36 minutes AFTER swimming 1.2 miles and riding 56 miles. While I am very pleased with what I accomplished, I felt very emotional after. I cried as I finished... and it was over just like that. I honestly felt great, but just felt odd. Everyone was there to support me, I completely didn't think to take pictures with everyone. I did thank everyone, but I just felt so out of it -- mostly because of how I felt emotionally. I'm not sure if anyone will understand the way I feel. For 5 months, my goal was cross the finish line of Florida 70.3 Ironman. You put so much time into something and then -- its just all over. Yes, I have a medal and memories, but it's the oddest feeling. It is similar to graduating high school or college. I worked hard, tried my best, and achieved my goal. It was hard work and dedication, frustrating at times, physically and mentally exhausting -- one of the hardest things I have ever done. And now, it is over -- just like that. Do I have future goals set? Of course. Augusta 70.3, Miami Man Olypic, Disney Marathon. Does that make me feel better now? No, but thats okay. I am going to let myself be and not judge my emotions. When I am ready, I will outline my next goals and be on to the next one.